Dismantled Barriers

After publishing Saturday night's post, I heard a commotion upstairs & on investigation, found Bebe standing in her doorway with a broom in her hands - the broom is part of the barrier Sime sets up every night to discourage Bebe from going downstairs &/or venturing into our room during the night. It usually helps her to feel safe too, as she can get quite anxious about being on her own in the dark. We have a nightlight on the landing & various laminated signs - arrows to the loo, info on where she is & one asking her to go back to her room & that we'll see her in the morning! 

The council social care department are going to let us try an electronic prompt device, on which we can record our voices & it will be triggered if she attempts to leave her room, so as she reaches for the door handle - our voices will kick in asking her to go back to bed... Clever! Will keep you posted on this, as we're quite intrigued!

Anyway, back to Saturday night's incident... Bebe had dismantled the barrier to our room & proceeded to threaten me with the broom, insisting that someone had been into her room! She then said she thought it was Sime & I getting up to something... Trying to drive her mad!

I managed to calm her down, but it was quite a surprise to see her in such a state. We think she suffers terribly when Sime goes out - she just gets completely lost without him, although she sometimes doesn't seem aware of him being out, but will ask several times during the evening if there is something wrong... We know folks with dementia tend to focus on the closest person to them, so we think when Sime isn't here - it's just turns her world upside down.

On Sunday, Bebe was restless & fearful - Sime was gigging again & last night she was back to her more relaxed & happy self... He was at home. It's fascinating, she may not converse with us much in the evening, but she does check on us a lot, probably making sure Sime is here.

This sundowning is really dreadful, it's awful to see just how tormented Bebe can be. It's hard to comfort her or reason with her, but at least our background in social care helps us to cope with her challenging behaviour, which is fine if we're not tired.

When Bebe is aggressive, we know not to take it personally & we are pretty good at diffusing situations... It can feel quite surreal at times - when we've been up with her in the night or she's argumentative in the evening, then just as sweet as can be in the morning. 

Thank goodness we do get some quality time each day, the chance to chill out together... 

Breakfast is our favourite time with Bebe, it's usually fun with lots of laughter & we always have conversations to get Bebe thinking. 

Here's our video from this morning...

 

Kay & Sime

xx